About Lambs and Loaded Guns

I have a huge backyard……lots of grass.

I also have two large parks with several soccer fields close to my home…… grass everywhere.

In my municipality I am allowed three dogs, and several cats on my property.

But what I really want is – instead of let's say three dogs and three cats - is to have a couple of lambs, a goat, two hens and a rooster… a total of six harmless animals.

I promise… I will build a tiny barn and cute chicken coop for them, let them graze and peck on my lawn; in fact take them to the soccer fields and let them graze there.

I promise to pick up their droppings… every one of them.

My friends, who have Border Collies can join me, to herd and round up my sheep and goat; finally do what is natural to them……we’ll all have a great time.

… and of course I will enjoy fresh eggs every day, as well as the soothing company of harmless animals, which I never intend to hurt in any way, and which present no danger to anyone.

But I can’t!

Municipal laws do not permit me to house these harmless animals, and understandably so…

This is not a farming community. It is an urban neighborhood… and if I long for such a life, I can pack up and move to the Okanagan.

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I am paranoid about my safety and security.

I want to feel really, really safe and be able to protect my family and myself.

I’d like to keep a gun at home, preferably a Glock 31 with a magazine capacity of 15 rounds, and the stopping power of a .357 caliber…

I promise… I will install a trigger lock, keep the magazine separate from the gun, and leave the safety always on.

I promise… I will attend courses showing me how to operate this gun safely.

I promise…my kids will never even see the Glock…

In fact I will keep it in a safe, hoping that when the bad guy comes through the bedroom window,
I will have the time to remember the combination, open the safe, take out the gun, find the magazine, unlock the trigger lock, load the magazine, slide one bullet into the chamber, not forget to switch the safety off, and be ready for any peril that may present itself.

But I can’t!

The laws of this land do not allow me to possess a gun at home for personal protection, and rightly so…

This is not the Felluce, the barrios of East L.A., or downtown Meddelin.

I live in North Vancouver…. One of the last safe havens on earth…

What do I need a gun for?

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Did I say I am allowed to have three dogs on my property?

Good… because I’d like to have three of the most powerful, most vicious, meanest sons’a bitches (pun intended) roaming around in my backyard.

If they are not mean enough, rest assured… I will make them.

Let’s start with a Pit Bull from a backyard breeder. Throw in a Cane Corso and a Presa Canario, - preferably from shady characters of the so-called guard dog industry. You know, one of those esteemed establishments that says on the gate:
“Brute Kennels… Our dogs take ‘em down… The coroner picks ‘em up”

- and we are talking…

true stopping power to reckon with…by formidable opponents…who are far superior to the Glock 31…

…because – despite all the precautions taken - unlike the Glock I am not permitted to have, these weapons of destruction are always close at hand, with the safety switched off, ready to take down anything that comes along.

I admit…far more destructive, and a far greater danger to society than the lambs and the chicks…or even the gun.

But who cares…That’s exactly what I want… and

…who’s there to stop me?

Yeah yeah, I promise… I will educate myself to make sure these animals never hurt anybody.

I will definitely let them roam in my backyard unsupervised, and let them do their job… protect me and my property that is.

I will chain them up once in a while, to hone their drive.

I have a six-foot fence. There is no way they can break through it, jump over it, or dig under it. I had a Golden Retriever once… she never did. I promise…

The guard-dog guy told me, that dogs of such caliber should not have a lot of human interaction; otherwise they go soft on you… so I will leave them alone… a lot.

I also don’t see any need to train them in any way. The guy I got them from said he did all the training that needs to be done. They are locked and loaded. He promised…

They are here to guard and protect, and that is inborn with these breeds.

They know what to do…who am I to teach them?

These are loyal guardians. They would never hurt my family or me… would they?

… and last but not least…I will certainly leave them intact and breed as many cross breed puppies from them as I can, and sell them by advertising in the papers. Lots of tax-free cash to be made here…

… And you better believe I can!

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All restrictions, laws and regulations, that seem to make sense in such matters as farm animals on urban properties, or arming ourselves with deadly weapons, come to an abrupt halt and are thrown out the window when it involves…

… booby-trapping our backyards with highly dangerous breeds of dogs – that are kept in deplorable conditions, and treated as inhumanely as it gets - , all in the midst of an urban neighborhood, among unsuspecting and innocent potential victims …

or when it comes to…

… unscrupulous and greedy backyard breeders , and a suspect, highly questionable, so-called “guard dog” industry.

In an urban society we are allowed to have pets, but…

…one would expect that the restrictions that apply to lambs and chicks, would equally apply to these ticking time bombs and loaded guns, who defy any definition of a pet.

…one would also expect that no one else but a licensed breeder, who has passed stringent criteria, would be allowed to breed and sell any pet animal, let alone such immediate threats to society.

…and last but not least, one would definitely expect that a shady sector such as the guard dog industry would be as closely monitored, inspected, regulated… as the gun sector.

But don’t bank on those expectations.

There is no education, no regulation, no expectation, and there certainly is no deterrent in place, when it comes to breed, buy, sell, own, and keep such dogs.

… at least not in B.C.

Call me naïve, but isn’t there something wrong with this picture?

Does anyone know what happened to the owners of the two Mastiff derivatives that tore apart Shenica White and scarred her for life?

…. or – for that matter - to the owner of any dog that was at the center of a fatal dog attack…

We all know what the victims had to go through, and the fate of those dogs but…

… what consequences did the owners face for their negligence or ignorance – to say the least…

… or was everything left between them and their questionable conscience

Does anyone want to know?

Does anyone care?

Hello…is anybody there…